i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
