i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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