I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Randomize
