I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
