Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
