so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
