Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
