if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
