That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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