It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Randomize
