I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
