I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
