is your mom at the bar?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
