I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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