There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize
