i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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