I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
You need Xanax blowdarts
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
