Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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