Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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