i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
NoShamevember. You game?
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
