Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Randomize
