If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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