the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
