Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
