What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Randomize
