I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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