I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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