I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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