wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
