why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
