Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
