apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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