I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Randomize
