The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
