I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
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