i was born a porn star she said
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
