he thought i was a dude.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Randomize
