Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
We need to get me chipped asap
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
