this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
