you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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