nut hugger
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Randomize
