I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
