do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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