I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
