I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
