Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
