He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
