...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
