Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
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