how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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